It has been commented to me several times over the last few years that I am "lucky to have real friends". I was surprised by the sentiment the first time, a little amazed the second and then sad the subsequent times. I often thought that it couldn't be that unique, but it can be for some. Friendships require work on the part of both individuals, time and a common heart that desires to maintain relationships. If you are the only one attempting to commit to the friendship then it will be very hard to establish deeper roots. I have been blessed with people who have common hearts bent toward loving friendships! I love and care for each one, knowing that they reciprocate the same toward me.
In our lives we have many outlets, but we also have more pitfalls--social media can create both. Facebook is a classic example where we can feel like we are missing out, being left out or being called out. If not used as an avenue for our good it can quickly become a tool for our hurts and destructive thoughts. I, in my own life, have chosen to post only those things that amuse, build up, preach His word or share things that will uplift. People that are negative are quickly hidden from my newsfeed, people that are mean are deleted...I have chosen to not allow the ugliness of others to pollute what I read and feed into my thoughts.
On the subject of friendship, I recently read Trend Breakers, Discovering and Choosing True Friendship in a Lonely World by Kelly Westerfield (full disclosure--we are friends via Facebook but I have yet to meet her, although after reading her book I think we have similar hearts and would make very good friends in real life!). Kelly discusses some of the areas of struggle to make, establish and maintain friendships that is reliant not on the trends or fallacies of this modern day but upon the deeper spiritual connections that draw us to the heart of God and each other.
The book starts off with her experiences and her desires and invites you to "make friendship a purposeful and necessary part of life". Dispersed throughout the book are the trials learned while seeking out true friends, the lies told to oneself (She doesn't need me) the self-doubts (we have nothing in common), excuses (I'm too busy right now) and the deferral (She has enough on her plate right now) and offers the steps to begin building true meaningful relationships. Bonus--there are recipes, ideas for meal planning and hospitality ideas for getting together.
I very much enjoyed reading her book and would like to share it with one of you. I will be doing a give-away. To enter tell me: What is the name of your first best friend? Mine was Debbie Reynolds...not THE Debbie Reynolds but a little blond haired girl in Washington state. It took me years to understand why my parents always laughed a little when I said her name. :)
