The Voice vs the voices

Yesterday I spent some time reading a facebook discussion revolving around the recent tragedy in Florida.  The discussion was respectful and engaging, spoke from both sides of gun control arguments and mental health issues.  Both sides have valid points, true talking issues and are represented by intelligent people with understanding and viewpoints.  I spent some time thinking about it, discussed it with one of the participants of the discussion and went on...but then God began speaking to me about this further so I want to share what God gave me, not to argue nor rebut, instead to add another facet that addresses and includes both sides.  My late Pastor A Wilson Phillips used to say that two seemingly opposite truths can exist and both be true at the same time, much like a double edged sword that divides the bone and the marrow.  This morning God gave me another image to help me view this: a diamond (or any cut jewel) has many facets that when light is shined upon it reflects light, it does not replace the light, but it will not sparkle without the presence of the light touching the facet....here's my facet: Voices have more power than anything the world can devise.  Proverbs 18:21MSG says "Words kill, words give life; they're either poison or fruit--you choose."

I grew up in a time where there was no social media, we had the news that came on only at night.  The world was weary (this was just after Vietnam) people were reeling from a nation at unrest over  disagreements of the decisions of the President.  This was all amid civil unrest, racial unrest and political unrest.  Most people were in an uproar over a national scandal and people were disillusioned.  Drug use was rampant and violence seemed to be at every corner.  There was unheard of violence on college campuses, schools were having protests and people were trying to find their voices.  People were being killed by the angry and the equipped.  As a nation people were frustrated because they felt like they were voiceless...but even more dangerous were  the voices that began to emerge that were armed with hate and abuse. But, and this is a big but....none of that was as big of a voice in my development as my own personal experiences.  There were, in my life, voices that were much more powerful and shaped me into the person I became.  Those voices were the ones that became locked in my mind and stayed there until God was able to slowly unwind them....but not all completely before I became a mom.  There were voices of kindness, but there were many more ugly and hurtful voices and experiences that took my voice.

I have four children, each of them beautiful, unique and intelligent. Each of them have their own personalities that have been shaped and formed over time, each of them have walked through different challenges and trials.  They have each experienced tremendous hurts and rejections at different points in their lives and disappointments have caused pain to them in different ways.  As a mother my role, at first was to help grow and thrive by feeding them, keeping them safe and secure while they transformed from helpless to independent; but as they grew my role grew. What grows the body does not always grow the mind and spirit.  The way I treated hurts from falls could not be applied to the the way I treated hurts from character falls...there is not a physical bandage for that, nor can you apply Neosporin to the scars in the heart the same way you can the knees. So how do we treat them?  With our voices: We speak words of affirmation, words of truth, words of correction, words of comfort, words of knowledge.   We speak in tones that either encourage or deter, we speak to them and not at them, we speak about the One who is our Spirit of Comfort and Peace.  OR we speak words of condemnation and shame, we speak words of destruction and defamation or we speak words of rejection and isolation.   And then a choice must be made...to who's voice am I going to listen?
Here's the raw truth, I didn't always speak Godly words, I didn't always operate in the right attitude.  I was not/am not a perfect mother.  I have attitudes that often have to be corrected and redirected. I have beat myself up many times for the words I have spoken to my children and have listened to my own ugly voice in my head over and over long after I've been forgiven by those I've hurt....the voices in my head were the ones that hurt me long after the incident and those joined the ugly ones that were left over from my childhood years.  My voice sounded more like destruction and not at all like the ones I endeavored to speak to my kids and definitely did not line up with what God had to say about me.                    

As I look at the issues being discussed, this thought keeps coming to me : What are the voices that are in the souls of these people inflicting this level of pain?  Who spoke into them that is resonating so soundly that vengeance is more of a driver than the sanctity of life ? What words of hate, hurt, abuse, rejection, repugnance, condemnation, shame, destruction where planted in these minds that creates this type of chaos and harm? The world looks at it and calls it "mental illness" and I guess in a way it kind of is, but not in the way that we like to classify it. My daughter, who is going into the field of studying mental illnesses rightly stated that most medically diagnosed mental illness are absent of violent compulsions, I think her figure was 1%.  You can't legislate mental illness nor solve this simply by removing the weapons of fear that have been used.  A tool is only a weapon when its intended use is to cause bodily destruction, it's how you choose to wield it that changes its intended function.  I would only be afraid of a hammer if someone was trying to injure me with it.

Which brings me to the story that sheds the light on the facet of truth I want to add.  There was a man that was known as "The Madman", he was a danger to everyone, including himself.  The town has resorted to completely exiling him to the mountains when they couldn't control him with chains and shackles..they had tried many times to control him but he always broke free and no one was strong enough to control him.  He tormented all who came in contact with him and even hurt himself with cutting himself with sharp objects.  But (and it's important to make sure your "but" is in the right place) when Jesus approached him the voices that spoke back were not the man's but the demons that lived in his headspace and body.  Jesus spoke to them...and cast them out.  Jesus did not condemn the man who had the demons, He spoke to the torment. He used to voice to set him free!   Jesus did not reject the man due to his state, He approached him and met his greatest need....when Jesus left his instruction was "Go..tell them your story"..use the voice that you now have.  Jesus gave him his voice back!!!  How long had that man been battling the voice he wanted to use but was overpowered by the evil voices?  How long had he lived in torment wanting to be loved and accepted but instead had been banished and rejected?  And to whom do we place the blame for his destructive presence?

How long can one live with hopelessness and rejection and not feel like theres no way out?  Evil lives in a headspace that echoes.  Abuse lives in a headspace that resonates.  That is a mental illness that is really a soul and spirit illness.  I do not excuse such behavior nor do I condone any violence....I hate what has been going on!  I do know, however, that the headspace of these perpetrators are different.  How do we treat them? Medication may numb the emotions, but can it transform their pains and hurts and bring freedom?  NO!  We need to change the voices and the conversations.  We need to address the internal voices....the ones that are echoing.  And we need to address the source...there is no love apart from Christ!
God gave me a phrase years ago when I was in the process of clearing out the ugly thoughts that remained in my head  "The words that remain unsaid are the ones that scream loudest in your head".