“From the rising of the sun, unto the going down of the same…the name of our Lord is to be praised”



The other day I wrote about starting my day, today I write about ending my day.
Like many moms, my days are quite filled with work, housework, kid-taxi, and personal interactions. By the end of the day I am usually drained…depleted…I’ve given all and it shows. I’ve been making a conscious effort in my mornings with all of my children and it has helped them and me be more positive and radiant throughout our days. But… by the time 4pm rolls in I am starting to go downhill, thus so do the children.
This week while driving one child to cheer practice (a very peppy child) and then later another to a different cheer practice (a very grumpy child) and later helping one child with homework (a very distracted child) and even later helping the oldest child work on an issue (a very tired child) my mood deteriorated to grunts and moans and, I must confess, eye rolling. And then. I logged onto Facebook to check on a friends status (she’s going through a very difficult time) and began to leave a message of encouragement. It said “I’m here for you, I’m praying for you and your family.” And it’s true, I have been. But I had not done so for my own family that day. I re-evaluated my state of mind, because in that moment I found that I had let life once again determine the mood and tone of my home. I had fixed the mornings, but the evenings were now to be taken to task. As always, the Holy Spirit was right there to realign and correct my spirit and to give me my evening song. My children’s moods lightened, my night felt less heavy and I began to relax, I even sleep more peacefully than I had in awhile.
Last night I slipped back into my old habit for a bit until my evening song popped back into my head and I began to right my heart, spirit and actions. I am ever grateful and thankful for the mercies of the Lord, they are new every morning!

Making a start

In the morning when I rise...in the morning when I rise, in the morning when I rise give me Jesus. Give me Jesus, give me Jesus. You can have all this world, please give me Jesus.

Each day I wake up, wake the teenagers and walk to the kitchen to make coffee. I'm rarely happy to be awake...to be honest I'm usually very grumpy about be awake so early in the day. In these early times I begin the engagement of battle between mood and mind. I am often spared conversation since my girls are engaged in the process of readying themselves for the day, usually sparing them from any infection of my poor state of mind.
Once the girls have left I have 15 minutes before I wake the next two children to ready them for school. My next two require more of me, more of my words, my time...So I work harder for them.
As I sat this morning, coffee in hand I was convicted with my lack of effort for my older two children. Why do I feel that the oldest two no longer need my input? Do they not need spiritual guidance? Have they arrived and grown so much that they no longer need a word of peace, love or joy to start their day? If anything, they need it more. They need the Word, Life and Truth pumped into their environment and mind and spirit as they begin their day...preparing them for their journey into the battleground of High School/Middle School.
I, too, need the Truth and Life to start my day, more than coffee, more than sleep...I need Jesus.

Rest for the weary

You know those times in your life when you are bone weary. You feel like there is never going to be enough sleep in your future to allow you to feel rested. It might be after the arrival of a new baby, or post surgery or maybe even due to work related stresses and even travel. But even when you feel like you'll never get enough sleep, you realistically know that eventually you will and it just seems like you won't.
Well, my poor husband has been feeling like this for over five years. His weariness has caused me great concern, enough that after all this time he has finally consented to undergoing a sleep study evaluation to determine if he has sleep apnea (I feel certain that he does...I'll know by 7 am if I am correct). His brother has it and has been on a C pap machine (air pressure machine for breathing) for over 10 years. I am also convinced that both of his parents have it, but I doubt anything will ever be done on their parts to correct the problem. But I digress.... I am quite excited that he may finally get the sleep that his body needs and my heart desires for him to have.

Finding joy

This season my son, Ryan, has been learning the game of basketball...much to the joy of both his parents. While I dislike watching basketball on t.v. I do enjoy the game in person. My husband and I both played the game in school, although he's the only one who played in high school. At first Ryan didn't really care one way or the other, but thought "sure, why not try it" when I asked if he was interested. As he began to learn and find out the nuances of the game he began to like it. When we went to a college game to watch it, he fell in love. Once he played his first game, he found joy! He truly enjoys playing and watching basketball. But there's more to his ball handling techniques and game rules on which he has been focusing.
The league on which he plays, Upward, has a few unique standards to teach and encourage. During each practice the coaches take a 15-20 minute break to present a Bible study for the team. I love that the person who each team member looks up to is the one speaking to them about God and concepts that tie into life and not just sports...scripted or not, it's a blessing. After each game the teams meet up and receive stars of recognition for their efforts in the game. The first week Ryan received a star for sportsmanship. The second week he received one for best effort. The third week he received the star that he had started praying to receive....Most Christlike. When his name was called for this one, his eyes lit from within...JOY! The rest of the day was interspersed with sentences of "I knew that God would want me to clap for both teams, because we were all working hard" and "I just wanted to make sure that Brandon knew that I thought it was a great shot" and "this is the best star anyone can get because it means that people can see Christ in someone". And in those moments I not only observed his joy, I was a part of it!

Happy Birthday to my second daughter

This blog post is belated, her birthday was the 3rd..but the sincerity is still deeply felt. Ive had this post in my heart since a couple of days before the big day but found little or no time to let it come to fruition. Between work (another blog post to come) kids and activities and life itself I have found myself going more than staying. The plus side is that we're rarely home to worry about the house getting messy...the other side is that I have had to incorporate more ways of becoming organized to make our lives run more smoothly. But I digress...

This post is about Jeanna (her real name, usually referred to as Niki on this blog).
This year has been a great school year with so many more awesome opportunities in the near future. At the beginning of the year she was still looking for the right niche, someplace that she fit in...she's a loving and giving girl who had yet to find her group. She was just jumping into things that gave her passion and joy (singing and cheer leading) She now sings in two different band as a part of our youth program. It has been such a blessing to watch her grow and develop into a confident and strong young lady. My daughter who was so shy and introverted now sings in front of people and is preparing to try out for high school cheer.

Happy Birthday (belated)!

Being true to my word

My last post I stated that I was going to spend more time being more mindful of how I was spending my time. I wanted to try to focus more on the people around me and the things that were important to them. I wanted to be more, do more, know and understand more. So how has it turned out?

My children and I have had more conversations, something that is not easy since there are four of them and only one of me. We have talked about serious things on their minds and giggled about silly things. I have met with friends for breakfast a few times a month and had in-depth conversations with them, we have shared life and traded secrets. I have learned more about my job and committed to it long term (this job was only supposed to be for three months) and invested my heart as well as my time into my bosses lives (they are wonderful friends with whom I've worked off and on for over 12 years and attended church for over 15 years). I have been cooking dinner (something I'm truly trying to hate less) most nights. I have been working on my photos for friends and even a few for a collection I'm hoping to complete this year.

I have also wandered into other avenues of outreach and contact. Through facebook I have re-connected with my sweet roommate from college (we had lost contact when I got married and she transferred colleges)...I have also found that facebook is an easy update for my day to day since I can update it from my iphone while sitting in the gym during a cheerleading class (my daughter's class, not mine ;) ) I have also tried twittering...not often but enough and I have read many many many other blogs.
I've been praying for those around me and those whom I only know via the internet.

So all in all, I feel like I have been true to my word. I have taken the break I needed, breathed a little deeper and am ready to dive back in. I am praying for the direction this blog is supposed to take and trusting that the words that flow will be exactly what they are supposed to be.

Here we go into the new year...2009 I am excited to see what you will hold for us all.

Driving, Working, Life goes on and on

The other day I had to drive the girls to ortho appointments in a town that is about 45 minutes away. This drive is one that I actually like because it has such beautiful scenery along the way as well as the fact that the road takes us right by my husbands work. Each time I've driven down this road I have wished for extra moments to stop and take a scenic shot or two. This day happened to be the day, this one shot is just a drop in the bucket of the beauty I found.

Life is so often like these trips I take. I look forward to them and often notice the things of beauty around, but rarely find the time to not only stop and enjoy what I'm seeing, but to actually document it for my memory or for others. Such as:
*My youngest leaving for school each day. She so obviously loves school,and looks forward to it with great zeal...
*My son when he is immersed in a book. His eyes are lit with joy, his face is completely animated...
*My second oldest daughter when she sings. She not only sings the words, she feels them...
*My oldest when shes talking to her dad. When they talk to each other about things that they have in common it's like a mirror of joy reflecting back and forth...
*My husband when he's watching the kids play. His love is pure, evident and everflowing...


The road in my life is curvy, has ups and downs, stops ands starts. But there is alawys something of beauty to behold...How blessed I am!

Happy Fall

Make a Smilebox postcard

Taking a minute to catch up

As I wrote a bit ago, I've been focusing on constructive purposes. I have been working quite a few hours, keeping up with the housework, and spending time with friends and family. My husband has been on vacation for the past week so we've spent time with him during the day when all the kids have been in school.
Moments celebrated:
Bria turned 15. She is now legally allowed to learn to drive.
Halloween trick or treating (happening as I type...Aunt Jill is taking them)
Ryan went to the Barn swings with the older kids for the first time (a huge priviledge)
Niki wrote and performed two songs with one of the bands in our youth group (made me cry with pride and touched my spirit very deeply...a longer post about this later)

I'll work on some photos and try to get them posted this weekend. Until then, I've missed you and hope to be back more often as things begin to slow down.

Bria goes to homecoming

Make a Smilebox photobook

My Son

This month has been choke full of life. My only son had his 9th birthday, and while I'll not wax poetic about how it seems like yesterday he was a tiny bundle of joy and cuddles...I will honor him with a quick post about all that is embodied in a boy of this age.
My son is:
Pokemon cards (200 +)
Webkinz (15)
Wii (2 new games)
Soccer
Basketball
Swimming
Reading
Drawing
(wants to be an artist and a photographer when he grows up)
Spy games
Silly voices
Dancing crazy
Begging me not to leave for a few hours with friends
(yes, he's still quite attached to me)

Life is never boring being the Mom of a 9 year old boy. And it keeps getting better and better.
My Son.

Constructive purposes

yard wide web
Originally uploaded by Jean 1.

When I went outside to grab the newspaper I noticed this beautiful spider web hanging between my tree and the shrubs. Its pattern, though not perfect, was done with obvious diligence.

Life, as we all know, goes by too fast. We spend our days trying to get as much done as we can in the limited hours we are awake. Our children complain that life is too slow. "That's too far away" is an often heard complaint around here when we talk about an upcoming event. In this life God has granted, I find that I fall short much too often in areas of importantance...but somehow I accomplish many trivial tasks merely because I can. I have decided to focus on more of the meaningful things in life in my day to day workings. I want to take more time for quiet time with my Bible and communion with the Lord. I want to sow into relationships in a way that blesses them. I want to know that when I look back at these days that I did more than make sure I caught the Today show regularly or see that my health is greatly improved to reflect a godly stewardship of the body God has given to me.

Make a Smilebox slideshow

Holes that make us whole

I found this shell while walking along the beach last week that struck a chord within my spirit. It looked a bit like a heart with a key hole in it....the sand shifted by the time I got a clear picture making it less heart shaped looking, but still the image was frozen there. I've thought about this image since then dozens of times. To me, the purest part of the heart with a key slot is that they key is required to fully make the heart complete, without the key there is still a hole there....but filling the hole makes it whole.

In my life I've had times of fulfillment and times of want. I've had times when I recognized the need for something or someone to fill a hole in my life. Early in my life I had the need for Someone, and He filled my life in a big way. As an adult, I find myself in cycles of times where I have a need, but I'm not sure what is needed to make me feel filled. As a mother, I've struggled at intervals for something more...something different, also as a wife. Always, and I do mean always, that need comes to my life and fills my empty spaces, not always in the ways I imagined, but always exactly how it is needed.

There, in that shell, my thoughts were triggered in a "key-hole" moment. Something clicked in place for me...something that I think I might have always known but not always in my consciousness:

The need that comes in our lives is by design! We have been designed to have needs. Just like a door with a lock is designed to need a key...the key is the integral part of the lock...the function being the lock, when fit with the key lets one in. My heart has many keys. On my key chain of life are these keys:
1. My savior
2. My husband
3. My children
4. My friends (some of which are also family)
5. My family
6. Photography
7. Travel
8. Writing
9. Music
10. Reading

These are some of my main ones. I enjoy seeing what key the Lord will use to open another area of my heart. What are your keys?

Ok...now I can come home...I'm done with summer vacations.

Make a Smilebox postcard

Breathe in, Breathe out.

While on my trip with Jean 2, I found this shirt that summed up the feelings we had during our adventures. We both have children, husbands, responsibilities, and so much on our plates that it seems like we are serving a buffet. But during this trip we were just us. Just two women on an adventure. While we were on the deck of the ferry, water surrounding us and wind blowing softly in our faces, we were relaxed. Neither of us thought of dishes that needed to be put away. Neither of us were concerned with how much milk was in the refrigerator. Neither of us were sorting laundry, changing sheets, folding towels. We just were there. In the moment. Being who were are when all the other things of life are not pressing in on us. We took pictures. We texted our friends and families about how wonderful it was to be where we were. We talked. We relaxed. We took deep breaths and laughed. I have found the fresh air I needed to begin on the new year of school that starts the 25th.

Why I've not been posting lately

Make a Smilebox slideshow

Autograph Please!

Recently on a trip to Chicago with friends I had the opportunity to see in person a famous actor. He was filming a movie that will come out next July about a famous criminal, the movie being set in the 1930's or 1940's. This man, J. ohnny D. epp, happened to be walking in to film a portion of the movie when my friends and I were walking down the road (video will be shared once I have the opportunity to get it edited for the web). My children, being very big fans of the P irates of the Caribbean movies, were/are thrilled with my brush with fame. My friends, with whom I was traveling, were also thrilled since they had been fans of his since their teen years. The meeting wasn't extraordinary, no physical embraces took place (although I'm sure my friends would have been thrilled with a hug) but it was the fame of the person that made the experience "something to tell".
The more I have thought about this experience, the more I began to wonder what it is that makes us so enamoured with celebrities...after all they are only people who get paid to be on film/t.v./radio. It's not like they have been gifted with special powers...I've yet to hear of a movie star giving sight to the blind, healing a lame man, or delivering mankind from their sinful nature. It's not that I disdain or have any kind of dislike for celebrities, but I simply see them as they are, just people. I have a friend who is related to a very popular celebrity couple. She is the sister. She is, to me, as important as the persons with the celebrity image. She is nice, kind, a loving mother, a giving aunt and has a deep vested interest in the local school. She is, to me, no less important than her family members. Maybe I should try to get her autograph.

Garages for Sale?

photo.jpg
Originally uploaded by Jean 1.

Today my children had a garage sale. They all priced, arranged, negotiated, bagged, and made change. The sale was mostly their stuff that had been living in our home, growing and morphing into piles of disproportionate sizes. I also had items that I wanted rid of, so out it all went. We started setting up at 8 (I know, professional garage sellers start at 7...but I'm not crazy enough for that) opened the doors at 9 and finished by 3:30. After the completion we loaded all that was left and took it to the Disabled American Veterans charity. While loading up the leftovers, I also decided to grab as many clothes as I could find that I no longer needed and threw those in to be donated.
The result? Some money was made, even more space was gained and the kids learned a valuable lesson..."just because it costs $20 new doesn't mean you'll get more than $3 for it at your garage sale."

Update on the madness that was my day

So, stated, my phone went crazy, therefore I did too. I was without phone, email, etc...for eight hours. It was something that drove me a bit crazy. Then? My tv's stopped receiving signal due to a line issue with the satelite. Then? Then? I discovered that someone had left the big freezer open and ruined all the food. ALL. THE. FOOD. I had just restocked it two days ago. We then headed to a fun filled lunch at Fat Rat's (Chuck E Cheese) and to errands. I did have the foresight to shut the freezer tight so that they ruined food would first re-freeze before I had to clean it out, thereby avoiding the worst smelling garage for our garage sale tomorrow.
In summary:
My phone-back in order
My tv-working again
My freezer-full of spoiled food
My house--a wreck with garage sale stuff
My brain-crashing quickly.

:) Try to control your jealousy.