A New Day Dawning

As the mom of four children, I have often been guilty of rushing here and rushing there only to find that I am late, I'm grouchy or I've forgotten an item needed. I have rushed us through chores just to get them done, I've rushed them out the door, I've rushed them through meals or rushed them off to bed. In all the rushing, one loses the day, the moments, the words of life. God built us to live not rush...He made us to savor, not scarf...He fashioned our days much like He has fashioned our hearts.
Morning does not break forth suddenly, the sun does not hurry to be at full crest the moment a new day begins. The day dawns, the dark gives way to light gradually, the sun takes hours to crest and begin to descend. Our lives, our children, our hearts must also emerge in like fashion. We grow into maturity, it's not instantaneous, our children need the time we have to give and the words we have to speak, for they are dawning each and every day toward life that is full of purpose. If all we demonstrate is rushing then the lesson taught is our purpose to "hurry up and get going". There is a time for immediacy, but it must not come at the cost of the dawning. As I sit here, reflecting on my children and how quickly it seems that they have "dawned" into ladies and a gentleman, I find that life provides all the speed my heart can handle. I am thankful for the time and wish only to cherish all that has been given.

This quote from Ann Voskamp says it so well:

“Being in a hurry. Getting to the next thing without fully entering the thing in front of me. I cannot think of a single advantage I've ever gained from being in a hurry. But a thousand broken and missed things, tens of thousands, lie in the wake of all the rushing.... Through all that haste I thought I was making up time. It turns out I was throwing it away.”
― Ann Voskamp, One Thousand Gifts: A Dare to Live Fully Right Where You Are

Technical Issues of Life

I had to walk away from my computer this morning for a time...I was frustrated and when I'm frustrated I"m fairly useless.  In my work, I am called upon to be the person showing someone how to do something, using the help guides and manuals when I don't know off hand.  How it's supposed to work and how it works are not always the same thing---but it should be.  This morning, after working with my team to get a program to function correctly and being unable we had to reschedule a meeting that had been anticipated by many.  There were no other options at that point.  It came down to a programming issue over which I have no control.

This has been mirrored in life in general recently for me.  As a mom, wife, friend and christian I am sought out for answers, advice and direction.  I generally can point to the Word, experience and the prompting of the Holy Spirit to provide these nuggets, but what do I do when I don't know?  How life is supposed to work and how it works are not always the same thing.  In the past year I've had several friends to whom I've given truth, spoken words of direction and even encouraged with hope but the situations did not actually turn out the way I saw them going.  At these times I am left to wonder, it's not like life can be rescheduled until a more convenient time.  Did I hear wrong? Did I give the wrong direction? Was it my own emotions that encouraged hope?  But it comes down to something much bigger, God has a different plan/purpose/problem that will be used for His glory.  I cannot control the words, only speak what I know to be true and trust that the one who has designed this life knows more than I do about the "programming" of the persons. I have seen miracles take place in the middle of these tough situations, been able to look back and see that the delay was the time God was using to prepare for the answer and see the times that hope was given to build up a foundation that allowed for a better outcome than the one for which I'd been hoping.

I am most grateful to know that God is the perfect designer when it comes to creating a product (us) and that He has planned and provided for each technical issue that comes up in our programming.  What may look like a glitch is really just a new option we didn't recognize before.

Trend Breakers

It has been commented to me several times over the last few years that I am "lucky to have real friends".  I was surprised by the sentiment the first time, a little amazed the second and then sad the subsequent times.  I often thought that it couldn't be that unique, but it can be for some.  Friendships require work on the part of both individuals, time and a common heart that desires to maintain relationships.  If you are the only one attempting to commit to the friendship then it will be very hard to establish deeper roots.  I have been blessed with people who have common hearts bent toward loving friendships!  I love and care for each one, knowing that they reciprocate the same toward me.

In our lives we have many outlets, but we also have more pitfalls--social media can create both.  Facebook is a classic example where we can feel like we are missing out, being left out or being called out.  If not used as an avenue for our good it can quickly become a tool for our hurts and destructive thoughts.  I, in my own life, have chosen to post only those things that amuse, build up, preach His word or share things that will uplift.  People that are negative are quickly hidden from my newsfeed, people that are mean are deleted...I have chosen to not allow the ugliness of others to pollute what I read and feed into my thoughts.

On the subject of friendship, I recently read Trend Breakers, Discovering and Choosing True Friendship in a Lonely World by Kelly Westerfield (full disclosure--we are friends via Facebook but I have yet to meet her, although after reading her book I think we have similar hearts and would make very good friends in real life!). Kelly discusses some of the areas of struggle to make, establish and maintain friendships that is reliant not on the trends or fallacies of this modern day but upon the deeper spiritual connections that draw us to the heart of God and each other.

The book starts off with her experiences and her desires and invites you to "make friendship a purposeful and necessary part of life".  Dispersed throughout the book are the trials learned while seeking out true friends, the lies told to oneself (She doesn't need me) the self-doubts (we have nothing in common), excuses (I'm too busy right now) and the deferral (She has enough on her plate right now) and offers the steps to begin building true meaningful relationships.  Bonus--there are recipes, ideas for meal planning and hospitality ideas for getting together.

I very much enjoyed reading her book and would like to share it with one of you.  I will be doing a give-away.  To enter tell me: What is the name of your first best friend?  Mine was Debbie Reynolds...not THE Debbie Reynolds but a little blond haired girl in Washington state.  It took me years to understand why my parents always laughed a little when I said her name. :)

Oh Lord you've searched me

I was talking to my youngest daughter about a few things, and when I say "talking" I mean disciplinary discussions about attitudes, and explaining to her my heart. The discussion centered around her keeping her room and bathroom clean but it encompassed so much more.  I explained to her that her room being messy every once in awhile is normal, expected even, since she is a child...but that to keep it that way is not desirable for many reasons. As I spoke I started pointing out some of the issues with a messy room:

•  it's hard to find the things you need or want to use
•  makes it hard to walk (safety)
•  shows little respect for your belongings
• it takes longer to clean up a when you've let your room get too messy
•  your forget what you have

As we began to clean her room together, she was reluctant to work...complaining some and even a few tears were shed.  But as the chaos began to be transformed into order and cleanliness she became happy and even excited.  In the chaos we found her missing iPod, her new shoes, a library book, some money and a favorite shirt that has been MIA for quite some time.  In her obedience to trust and obey she found many blessings and a few surprises.  

In my own life I have found the same principles to be true when I am not keeping my own heart clear of messes...when I let my life dictate my LIFE and I find myself knee-deep in emotional chaos.  Some of the issues with a messy mind/heart:

• it's hard to find the joy and peace I need to live the life to which I've been called
• it's hard to walk in newness of life that has been laid before me
• it shows little respect for the ones God has put in my life
• it takes longer to sort out the relationships and hurts you create
• you forget just what is is that you have

Daily, like with keeping a tidy room, I must clean out the things that threaten to clutter my heart and open my path to walk throughout my day.  When I do so, I often find unexpected joy, sometimes an opportunity to serve, a positive interaction with my husband or children, a new favorite song that makes my heart sing, and sometimes money that I left in the pocket of my favorite jeans!   In my obedience to trust and obey I find many blessings and sometimes a few surprises.  

"Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me" Psalm 51:10

This song...oh this song!!! has been speaking to me the last several days.

The first lines are "Oh Lord you've searched me, you know my ways.  Even when I fail you, I know you love me!

Release

There was a time in my life when 10am on a Thursday meant watching an episode of Little Bear with my oldest two, or Blues Clues with my son, or The Wonder-pets with my youngest....I still have tucked deeply in my heart the related characters and/or theme songs.  I loved those days...most of the time.  But if I'm honest, and I am, I can say there were days that I thought to myself "I am going to go crazy if I hear _____(insert "cat whine about duck getting in the way", "the mailbox song", or "The Phone...the phone is ringing") one more time!  I felt like the days were endless sometimes, the chores insurmountable and the vision of being an at-home-mommy felt like drudgery.  Now, 10am on a Thursday means that I am alone in a quiet house, the only sound is coming from the ticking of the clock and the clicking of my keys on the keyboard...and I miss Little Bear, Blue and Ming-Ming....not in a melancholy kind of way, but in a "that seems like so long ago" kind of way.  Its so easy to lose sight of today due to looking to tomorrow or gazing back at yesterday....it can rob you of your joy today.

And we have such trust through Christ toward God. Not that we are sufficient of ourselves, to think of anything as being from ourselves, but our sufficiency is from God, who also made us sufficient as ministers of the new covenant, not of the letter of the Spirit; for the letter kills, but the Spirit gives life. 2 Cor 3:4-6

As mom in the midst of planning a birthday parties, picking up/dropping off kids at school or work, and doing the endless laundry that accumulates, I often have to remind myself that my calling is still to serve and to witness to my children on a day-to-day basis. Two of our daughters are drawing near to testing their wings and beginning their journey into adulthood...and this, if left unchecked in my spirit, brings me to tears fairly easily.  I have found that it's easy to look back at the Little Bear days as the "good old days" and forget the joy of "Pomp and Circumstance".  I have to fight the urge to cram every little bit of parenting and wisdom into each conversation.  It's when I fight these urges with truth that I am again able to rest in the knowledge that God is not only my sufficiency but theirs also.  And in that rest I can enjoy what is now...and helping them plan for tomorrow with joy and excitement on their behalf while reminding myself to cherish the days I still have with the younger two.

Being "In"

My life continually revolves around my four children, my husband, my obligations, my messes....all while being in the life He has called me to live,  who lovingly is guiding me to live up to the standards He has set for me.  It can be daunting, overwhelming and honestly often discouraging when I feel I am failing.  

The goodness of God is that He always finds very real ways to show His love and heart via my own.  Unfailingly, He brings teachable moments so that I must rehearse His words to another and in the process dig them deeper into my heart.  

A few weeks ago I had a child struggling with concepts in a few classes, with feelings of "stupid" and "not good enough".  This child, a very easy going child, ended up in the nurses office with upset stomach thereby requiring me to pick them up and take them home from school.  My spirit discerned that this was not medical but spiritual...and we all know "how you think determines how you feel".  When I began digging into this child's issue the Spirit prompted me to ask about their classes and experiences at school.  

"Are you being picked on?" --No

"Do you have friends with whom you hang out and talk to?"--Yes

"Did something embarrassing happen?" --Silence

"Are you having problems in any classes?"--Tears

For a child who so desperately wants to please, relishes in the joy of their parents, and likes to be a helper to those struggling...a lack of understanding in an area that seemingly is easy for everyone else and the resulting grades of struggling is devastating.  This situation was robbing the joy from the days, weighing down the hours and depleting all the life from morning to night.  The days were daunting, overwhelming and discouraging----feelings with which I can readily identify.
So often we judge ourselves and others by performance. Someone singing well, getting good grades, having a visually pleasing appearance, being the supermom/dad earns the mental and verbal applause of the community.  Someone working hard but only coming out on average doesn't provoke the same reward; a struggle or failure often garners the mental or verbal "boo" from us and/or others.  


God has had me camped out on this verse for several weeks:

Ephesians 1:6 KJVTo the praise of the glory of His grace, wherein He hath made us accepted in the Beloved.

There are so many nuggets of truth in this one sentence...so many depths of who He is and we are.  His grace accomplished our acceptance just by being "in" the Beloved.  We cannot earn His acceptance, we cannot posture for it nor can we cajole it...His acceptance is simply given because of His grace..and His grace is like breathing, it happens just because of who He is and His character, without effort or thought.


Our arguments of who we think we are and who we really are begin to look like this in the face of daunting, overwhelming, and discouraged:


But God....makes us accepted in the Beloved.
But God....calls us priests and kings
But God....who knew no sin became sin so that we could be called  righteous
But God...has set us apart, made us a holy nation
But God...we can do all things through Christ who gives me strength
But God...we are over-comers through the blood of Jesus Christ
But God...in our weakness He is our strength.


As I sat down with the verse from Ephesians I began to share with my child:

 "I love you simply because you are here.  My love and acceptance for you is like God's grace....it's like breathing...it happens without thought, without provocation and without your seeking.  The struggles are what makes us realize our need for Him, but His acceptance never wavers, His grace is always faithful.  It's our attitude and how we look at Him that changes our views.  Your struggles in classes made you also realize your need to ask for help from me and your father...but your view of us and our acceptance (or worry about rejection) is what kept you from asking for help. As you adjust your view of us and our desire to help you succeed, you will relax and simply ask.  God teaches me that daily, He wants me to simply ask for help with the trust and faith that He is ready to help me succeed. "

So often we lose sight of the vision the Father has for us but is faithful to give us opportunities to see His work in our lives...it's never about the circumstances...it's always about the life in them.  

They that wait....

The other day I was driving home from an errand when I noticed that, even though it was almost 6 pm, it wasn't completely dark..where just the week before the that exact time of day would have revealed a blackened sky and stars already glowing.  I was jubilant, as I often am, when I realized that spring is inching closer and closer. I long for the light, the warmth, the new life that springs forth each year.

This realizations mirrors the transformations that have been dawning in my heart as well.  God has used this time that my blog has been dark to do some deep workings in my spirit and heart and the light is dawning....the life has been budding in generous proportions and the warmth that He has given me for others is drawing me again to share His words, His plans and His life.  Happy Internal Spring!  :)

Rebuilding

10 years ago we moved into our house.  Two months later we had a storm come through that required we replace our roof.  5 years later an even bigger storm ruined that roof and required we get another new roof.  Part of the problem is that our first replacement was not done right.  They had not removed everything to the roofs foundation but instead built upon what was actually also faulty.  Needless to say, our insurance company was not happy..but thats another story.  We learned that not only hiring someone who knew how to roof was important, but also that he/they must know how to do it right from the very beginning.

4 years ago a storm, of the spiritual nature, came through that required I adjust my heart and deal with hurt, forgiveness and loss.  It was a rough storm that knocked me around a bit.  Repairs were done and we went on.  A year ago an even bigger storm came through that made the first one seem minuscule and knocked me cleanly off my feet.  This one dealt an even bigger blow to my spirit and required a rebuilding from the ground up.  What had caused the greater turmoil was not only the storm, but that I had also failed to repair the foundation of my beliefs and address my hurts and loss in the fullest way.  I learned so much through it, and am still learning.  My foundation has been shirred up, my faith has been re-established, but I must always be mindful that the foundation must remain strong to allow me to withstand the storms on the horizon.

Ice Cream, Concerts, Swimming and Sleeping In

Our summer is rolling along smoothly and a bit too quickly for all of our tastes.  We have discussed trying to find a worm-hole in town that would cause our days to loop around a few more times.  I must admit that this summer has been so much more enjoyable than last year since I am no longer trying to balance working part time and all that the kids want/have/need to do.  

We've been swimming a few times (not as much as we'd like due to rain) and caught a few movies. The kids have slept in....one day until 1pm and have stayed up late...one night until 2 am.  We have bought ice cream, make ice cream, consumed ice cream and maybe even screamed for ice cream--that one was probably me.  

We have attended a couple of concerts...free wonderful concerts with positive messages and joyful people. Sleep overs have been hosted and also attended.  Fireworks were the source of awe and applause as desserts were consumed by friends that are as much as family.  The husband has been making dinner at least three times a week, due of course to his new wonderful grill and we even finally bought a new patio table--which of course we've only used once since it's rained almost daily since we bought it.  

All these things are good, wonderful and even needed.  But even more needed has been the time.  As summer...how we longed for you and are enjoying your stay.  Please don't hurry off!  

This weekend I scrapbooked (yes, I have made a noun a verb.  I'm aware of it and OK with it.  ;)  ).  Not my digital way, but the tactile hands-on with adhesives and paper scrapbooking.  Its been years since I actually put scissors to paper and created something other than a card here and there, and it felt good.  No, scratch that...it felt GREAT.  My friend Kim C (Hi Kim!) asked me to go with her and to be honest...I went mainly for the fellowship.  I enjoy spending time with friends and figured...hey, it's not expensive, it's close by the house and breakfast lunch and dinner (plus snacks) are included-I'm in!  Once I was there it took me a couple of hours to settle in and do something...it was probably the freebies that hooked me or maybe the small class we did or perhaps it was the old photos of me and my family in front of me...but whatever it was I began working on my parents albums and talking and just settling back into "me".  I wasn't always creative, sometimes I was merely slapping pages together and calling them done, but I was getting stuff done.  In all, I finished 40 pages.  

In this recent experience I grasped onto something very important...TIME.  Not only do I need that time, but time is fleeting.  I was sitting in front of photos of myself as a child, photos of my parents when they were my age...and they are now just memories in a scrapbook.  If I want to have more for myself, my husband, my children, my friends...the time is now while I am able to do more than just write a date and place of occurrence.  I have always had a mentality of "someday"...but all things should be "today".  Today I will spend more time with God.  Today I will spend more time with my kids.  Today I will spend more time with a friend.   Today I will.  Today. 

Staying on the Path

When my children and I take walks together it is often without a set path, we just start walking.  We may head out the door to see what is happening at the playground behind our home and then end up following the path that leads behind the school ending up down by the creek.  We will meander along, sometimes seemingly in circles and other times we may stay along the path until we find something that MUST be photographed. I had only been lost once in my life before I was a mom and knew that I couldn't allow myself to let this happen when my children were with me.  I enjoy these times with my kids, but i am also mindful of the direction we will need to take to return home, always with the "this turn then this turn" will get us back to familiar ground.  I enjoy the wandering but also crave the safety of being where I  belong.  I am an adventurer with very distinct homing senses; sometimes there are obstacles along these paths.  The creek may be swollen, not allowing us to cross.  Someone might stumble and fall, requiring a stop to treat the pain and the tears.  Sometimes the canopy of trees may block out the sun, making it hard to see the path. Still other times there might be a dangerous situation arise-a mean dog, a suspicious shadow or such.  All these problems may require us to redirect, to rethink and replan our route, but the destination remains the same--HOME.  My children have learned to trust me to get them where we need to be even if they are afraid or can't see the path.

In life we also have paths that we are walking, paths that have a distinct destination, but there often arises obstacles, distractions and dangers that may require us rethinking that path we are taking. Sometimes it may just be that we need to stop, treat the pain and treat the tears and others it may require us stopping, turning around and going back to a different pathway.  A few weeks ago there was a stumble in my heart, my spirit.  Circumstances brought pain and loss into my life via the loss of one of my dearest friend's husband and child, a family to whom my heart is deeply and eternally tied.  My heart broke, my mind was seized with fear and my spirit quaked.  I could no longer see the path and I couldn't see the Son in all of it, I was swathed in shadows.  I have spent some time questioning the path, doubting the path and even sat down for a bit needing to tend my pains and tears.

Finally I am finding the light on the path again, I do not understand why the path took the turn it did but I'm choosing to trust my Father to get me where I am supposed to be going.  I will stay on the path, continue to walk and believe...for who else can I trust if I don't trust the One who created my path. 

Today: March 03, 2010

Today we celebrate.  Today we celebrate my youngest daughter's birthday...she is now 7.  SEVEN!  She, in all her seven-ness, has requested for lunch a McDonald's cheeseburger-ketchup only.  She has asked to have Dr. Pepper for her lunch drink.  She has chosen Krispy Kreme for the class snack (her's being the only one that is chocolate iced and custard filled) She has chosen to wear her new outfit that Daddy took her to buy yesterday on their special Daddy/Daughter shopping trip.  She fell asleep listening to the iPod her bought for her...it is, of course, PINK.  She has another loose tooth, this will be her 7th lost tooth.  She told her Daddy last night, with a choked up voice, that "Today was terrible, and then there was you and it was all great" and then she hugged him. And held him and she teared up.  And he teared up.  And then she smiled a glorious and loving smile and put in her earbuds and walked off to bed.  Yep, she's a bit dramatic...nothing bad had happened that day, but she couldn't find the words to say how special her time with Daddy....terrible to great was the only analogy that she could find.  It got the point across.  :)

Happy Birthday sweet girl!  I'm off to buy a webkinz, book a party and then call Stacey for a long ago promised cake.

Etching out some time for me

I've been very busy, even though this is my first week off of work, with projects and of course birthday breakfasts, lunches and dinners.  :)  I'm not complaining, but I am busy.  As I type I am squeezing a few moments for myself before I pick up kids, drop off kids, pick up different kids, run one to cheer, pick another up from practice and somewhere in there make dinner, update a couple of web items for a project, upload and order some prints for an art show and, and, and.......
But right now? I'm etching out a moment for myself with a cup of coffee.  I hope to post more later, but if not...well, I think you'll understand.

Leaks, Patches and Restorations

Our pipes have decided to revolt this week....and spread their watery deluge upon our ceilings and wall and carpets. Not once, but twice. Yep. Twice. Two different pipes in two parts of the house affecting four ceilings and two rooms of carpeting. The leaks were both caught rather quickly, so damage was minimized...but damage was done. The amazing part is that we were actually home saw the damage done, was able to trace the water to their originating places and get them handled quickly. Because of the first leak, all the necessary items for repair was already on site. The first leak was in an obvious location, the second could have gone on for a prolonged time since it was in a mostly unused area of the house...which could have caused a great deal of damage and cause us to incur a rather large expense. Because of the first leak, we knew who to call, where to look and was actually more aware...more open and ready to spot a problem. The work will take a week or two to repair, but once finished, all will actually be better than it was.

Our spiritual lives are often like these leaks. We see the damage, the outward signs of trouble, but sometimes we have to do some work to find the leak. There is, sometimes, two leaks going on at the same time, but without the awareness of the first, the second might not be caught as quickly. Without the first, the second issue might not be noticed at first. My husband and I have been reading a book called Humility by Andrew Murphy. It's a good book, one that has been touching our lives in different ways. I've enjoyed the book, it's been good...but my husband, well he has been deeply touched by it. As we have been discussing things I've noticed his countenance changing and his mindset switching. It's as if there was a leak going on and with God drawing his attention to one area he's become more aware of the other areas that He wants to tweak. I get it, God did this with me when I read "Hinds Feet in High Places". I had been struggling with life and all that I had been through. I had lost my trust that the path He had me on would take me someplace good, someplace that would make my life better. As I read that book I began to see the paths were there to make me more aware, make me more compassionate and at times make me stronger and more resilient. It took me becoming more aware of the path and the stones that were tripping me up that kept me from falling the next time. As I walked the path of learning to trust God revealed to me a second leak that had a greater potential for damage, left unchecked could have caused a great deal of damage to my spiritual life and marriage...I had not released my heart from a hurts in my past. But God, in His mercy, brought my heart to the place were I was looking for the "leaks" in my life and was ready and willing to fix that problem once I knew that it was lurking there. There was some tearing out that had to be done, some patching that was needed, but end the end...I came out on the other side better than I went in.

For Today: January 29, 2010

Outside my window...a winter storm has moved in, bringing with it snow...continual snow and an early release from school.

I am thinking...that my in-laws are going to have rough drive here tonight.

I am thankful for...warmth, health and the plan that God has for our lives.

From the kitchen...last night chili was made ahead and tonight going to prepare chicken...can not have enough prepared ahead when the in-laws are coming

I am wearing...my favorite hoodie, jeans and my hubby's slippers

I am creating...much...much...much

I am going...nowhere! Everything has been canceled due to the weather.

I am reading...Humility by Andrew Murphy and Rule #1 (STILL...a lot to take in)

I am hoping...always

I am hearing...Dr. Phil in the background..he's talking about people who have a need for others to know their lives (rather ironic as I blog)

Around the house...a new Eden Pure heater (love it), freshly cleaned carpets and the impending arrival of the aforementioned in-laws.

One of my favorite things...my wacom tablet. Its so handy and helpful with photo editing and designing.

and now...a photo :

10 years ago....now...10 years from now

Looking back...I am amazed how much has changed in 10 years. We had two little girls and a brand new baby. Our house was smaller and our income was just starting to increase.

Now...We have four kids. Our first is a driver, our next is about to get her drivers permit. I am approaching 40!!!! We have been married almost 20 years.
We have been working our way through a national recession but God remains faithful.

Looking forward...I will have two kids out of college (most likely), one in college and a new driver. I might even be a grandma by then. I will be approaching 50. My husband will be about to turn 50. We will be married almost 30 years.

We were thinking...that we needed a bigger house. We had outgrown our house...our new baby was still in a cradle but we were soon going to need a room for him. We were blessed, God had taken care of us financially and was allowing us to finally pay off our debt. We were starting to get to a good place in our marriage..it has since blossomed to a wonderful romance.

We are thinking...that God may require us to move again, maybe sooner than we think. The economy has slowed, but God has not...the next 10 years will be ones that will prosper due to the discipline He has been building in us the last two years.

I am thankful for...the growth of our family...not just our core family, but with rungs of love and growth. We added another child in the last 10 years. Relationships have changed and become something that I had only prayed would happen. I have reconnected with friends from the past that has brought a tremendous amount of joy!

We are praying...for direction, wisdom and guidance as we make decisions and changes in our lives.

Struggles...10 years ago...losing weight
Struggles...now...weight, but it's in process
Struggles....10 years from now..hopefully it's beat by then. :)


Now...some photos...
Ten Years Ago:


Now:

For Today (Tonight) : December 29, 2009

Outside my window...A dark night with a chance for snow...makes the kids happy, me not so much.

I am thinking...I should probably plan something for dinner.

I am thankful for...a warm home!

From the kitchen...who knows. I'm so tired of the "what's for dinner" question

I am wearing...jeans and my very old (have had it at least 20 years) sweater cardigan.

I am creating...some photo collages and calendars

I am going...to need to go grocery shopping soon, it's been a week and we are out of all laundry soap, and dish soap not to mention food items needed

I am reading...Humility by Andrew Murphy and Rule #1 (STILL...a lot to take in)

I am hoping...always

I am hearing...hillsong

Around the house...the Christmas trees are still up and decorated and will be for at least two more days.

One of my favorite things...my new shark steam mop! Got it for Christmas, it's wonderful. Bonus? It comes with a carpet skimmer to use to deodorize.

and now...a photo of our first white Christmas in 10 years

For Today (Tonight) : December 1, 2009

Outside my window...A dark night with a drop in temperatures occurring throughout the day.

I am thinking...about how to do some new things on a website on which I am working

I am thankful for...the day I was able to spend with my husband, and how blessed I am to feel about him the way that I do.

From the kitchen...Scallops in Cream sauce (My husband told me to be sure that you are thanked Angie!), Cheese stuffed chicken, salad with bleu cheese crumbles and roma tomatoes, homemade guacamole and bread.

I am wearing...my "skinny" shirt and khaki's...(bought the shirt a year ago for inspiration...and it worked!)

I am creating...some ornaments demonstrated by Angie (photos will be attached)

I am going...to be very busy the rest of this week! (Two cheerleaders with practices, two performances, a basketball game, a basketball practice, church, work, a night out at Art Walk, a Christmas party and a drive to and from St Louis for one of the mentioned performances)

I am reading...Humility by Andrew Murphy and Rule #1 (still...a lot to take in)

I am hoping...always

I am hearing...the music playing from the playlist @ mixpod.com

Around the house...I've been actually decorating for Christmas...even put a cute tree upstairs.

One of my favorite things...my wacom pen/tablet...makes editing photos and drawing much easier.

and now...a photo

For Today, November 23

Outside my window...Sunny but less than warm...in other words, it's November

I am thinking...how thankful I am that we have a warm house and ample supply of coffee

I am thankful for...the readily available items to meet of all our earthly needs.

From the kitchen...Pepperoni Pizza and Chicken Parmesan Pizza and break sticks.

I am wearing...jeans, my favorite Ralph sweatshirt

I am creating...(trying) to create some ornaments demonstrated by Angie

I am going...to the Discovery Center tomorrow with the youngest's 1st grade class field trip

I am reading...Rule #1 (still)

I am hoping...always

I am hearing...the football game my husband is watching

Around the house...my wonderful fall flowers in my ball canning jars...they make me smile

One of my favorite things...Pumpkin Pie Andy's custard! YUM

and now...a photo to share from my archives:


the door from the library to the coffee house next door.


http://thesimplewomansdaybook.blogspot.com/

Thanksgiving

As the Thanksgiving holiday approaches (at lightening speed) I have been feeling pressed within my spirit to think daily of those things for which I am thankful, as are many of you. For God's love and mercy, for my family, my friends, His blessings and tender mercies.
While I was pondering this today I kept returning to the words of a hymn that would pop into my thoughts. It rolled its way throughout every thought I had, it invaded every nook and cranny of my morning. It was my constant tune in my ears and spirit.

And then I received the news of an acquaintances loss yesterday, a father lost to a mother and two daughters in a car accident. My second daughter has gone to school with the oldest daughter since 5th grade. The mom is a friend of one of my dear friends. I was reminded then that this years Thanksgiving will be one of new loss for them, and hurt and pain. But God,in this, can also be found peace, and rest and healing and even thanksgiving for what they had known. Not right
away, maybe but that is my prayer.

Jesus, keep me near the cross;
there a precious fountain,
free to all, a healing stream,
flows from Calvary's mountain.

Refrain
In the cross, in the cross,
be my glory ever,
till my wounded soul shall find
rest beyond the river.

2
Near the cross, a trembling soul,
love and mercy found me;
there the bright and morning star
sheds its beams around me.

3
Near the cross! O Lamb of God,
bring its scenes before me;
help me walk from day to day
with its shadow o'er me.